You know that the number 11 is one of my favorite numbers. When I saw that it has been 11 days since I wrote here on line, I decided it was about time to write here. I have been word vomiting in one of my paper journals. I have been doing a lot of thinking and writing about this Randy stuff. This Randy stuff that I didn't even have a real clue about except for a weird gut feeling in Dec. and parts of Jan. For myself I had been going through some digestive issues for awhile, just trying to figure out which food was bugging me. So I was somewhat distracted. Then I got that lovely ambulance ride and overnight stay in the hospital. So back to this Randy shit fest, hahahahaha.

I can't remember the timeline so much anymore because as you all know, I live for and in the moment. So I will do my best. Randy told me that at work, the people he takes care of have been having this viral stomach shit going on. Apparently he started to feel poorly himself. Rather than have Stacey Chapman take care of him, he told her that he is going home, like he should have to begin with even before it all started. Like I have written, I didn't ask for or expect this fuckin' drama. So Randy one morning, out of the blue, showed up, here, sicker then a fuckin' dog. He said he really, really needed and missed me. He needed me to take care of him. He was so sick. So I don't know, maybe I was foolish or something. I agreed to take care of him. Who else over the years has taken care of him when he is super ill. Who knows how to help him. So he had to call in sick two days in a row, and then plus he had to have a 24 hour all clear, no symptoms of the viral bug. He is doing better as each goes along. For awhile there all he did was puke, poop, and sleep. I made sure to keep him hydrated and his sheets clean. I changed those fuckin' sheets every day. The bonus is, I haven't not gotten it. Smart me, wore one of my masks. I always wear one whenever I have clinic appointments and have to go into that cesspool of germs. So Randy came back home here because he knew, I would probably say yes to help him. Now I don't know what to do?

It has been warmer temps here, so when he is sleeping during the day, I have gone for a walk. I need to be out in nature. The air, sun, and just being present in nature helps me clear my head. I also need to empty my mind of any thoughts. I need to feel what I should/may do. Right now, I don't have a clue. So this is where I am right now.

Peace.