Life's Challenges....What Do You Think? (2012-01-29 - 6:06 a.m.)

Well yesterday wasn't the best day for me. I was soooooooo ornery, I didn't even enjoy my own company. So far this morning has been better. I feel bad for my husband. I thanked him for putting up with my ornery mood.

One thing I brought up yesterday was what are we going to do with that huge pile of debris in the backyard on the edge of the property. First my husband said to me, who is "we," he reminded me that was where I decided to put everything. He wanted to put it up by the side of the road. That doesn't belong to us, it belongs to the township, and it looks awful. None of our other neighbors ever do that. This pile would have been 30 feet long or more, 10 feet wide, and about 6 feet high before the weather, such as rain and snow have compacted it down. So his comment you can imagine just made me ornerier(I think I misspelled that). He alluded to the fact that since I did it, that I didn't listen to him, that now honey, it is all yours to deal with. OK then, he should just let me deal with it. See, I didn't want to put it where he wanted to because it would look awful, it probably for the most part would have still been all there. The neighbors would probably have complained to our township board, rather than offering to help us(OK me now). It sucks not having a truck anymore. That is besides the point. I am always thinking, don't you know. That is my coined phrase, I am always thinking. So again I suggest putting an ad in the paper next Spring, asking for help, saying I would pay, I figure $10.00 an hour. I want someone to help me get rid of it. I would also help to speed things up. My husband didn't want me to put an ad in the paper. It would probably bring people here who would steal from us. OK then. So then I got to thinking some more. Next time the snowplow truck guy comes through. I am going to talk to him. He lives on a farm. He has equipment to move things like manure, etc. He lives in the area. He knows how to work in this day and age. Who wouldn't want an extra $10.00 an hour. Plus I know who he is, and I know who his parents are. He was in sports, baseball and football, a couple years ahead of my son, so we know each other. See I am always thinking. I don't know if I mentioned this, but a couple of days ago, my neighbor, I call him the "new" neighbor came to his place. So I went over to talk to him about bartering my time and energy to pick up his pinecones, remember me writing about all the zillions, and do some raking. I have alot more time. I wanted to barter my time and energy for his four wheeler and trailer. He would have to help me, and he would drive it back off the Island to the place we all are allowed to dispose of the natural debris. I felt stupid after I got done talking with him. First he seemed surprised that I would even offer, then he said why don't I just burn the pile. I can't, he said it wouldn't burn anything else. Famous last words, there are pines and oaks surrounding the pile. The propane gas tank that is filled to heat the house is near there. I thought, I get it fellow, you don't want to have anything to do with helping me out or bartering. So I walked home. This is the guy who I think takes chances on windy days and burns, he also burns on Sunday which I know is against the law. So I checked that idea off my list. At least I tried. Back to talking about this with my husband. Remember he said it is my problem)(challenge) now. He brought up why haven't I dragged any of the big limbs and such onto the channel and burned that yet, wasn't that what I was going to do. WTF, I can't do everything by myself. Besides I don't like burning all that much. I think it is dangerous, and if I am burning something and I start to not feel well, what am I supposed to do. So I don't really burn alot anymore. Last Summer one evening after 6 pm I burned a huge pile near the edge of the channel. I had to be there working on the pile until 11pm, then you have to put it out. Well, my husband comes out around 10:30pm to put it out. He is all about staying within the rules. So he puts it out, it smoldered all night, I got up many times and went outside with my flashlight to check. So this discussion I was having yesterday with my husband didn't go to well, which didn't make my day any easier. So if anyone has any ideas, boy am I listening. Too bad, that people don't just want to help others anymore out of the goodness of their hearts. What happened to be kind to others. I help out my neighbors.

I am hoping today will be a better day here. Yesterday Sadie was also more whiny than usual. So I don't think she was feeling the best either. The sun just wasn't staying out to suit her needs. It would be out and shiny into the house, then it would go under the clouds. Sadie then looks at me, now this is me thinking and saying this is what Sadie must be thinking. "Why can't you(my doggie momma) keep that sun shining on me, so I can bask in it?" I wish I could do that for her, it would make her day so much better. I would do anything to be kind and help out my fur babies, but keeping the sun out all day for you Sadie is something I can't make happen. So wish I could. So I am thinking, I am always thinking, in comparsion, maybe Sadie had a day that was worse off than me. You got to put everything in perspective don't you!!!