Another 5 day work week for me. My husband's work schedule will be doing some shifting now. So I suppose that will be an adjustment for him and myself. I really don't care, I just need to know when he works so that I am extra quiet when I come home from my work, in case he is sleeping. My mom is itching to meet us or both my mom and dad would come over here for a visit. I don't care what they decide to do. I just want to know when and if they want to come here, so that I can do some major house cleaning, even though my mom and dad know that I am a somewhat messy person. Since they are getting older, it would be alot easier on them if they came here and stayed for awhile, I don't care how long they stay, though they never do stay too long. They should, so they can rest up. The drive back to where they live is over six hours away. It is a very long drive. This coming weekend is Memorial Day weekend, so the Island will be busy with people and activity. I am not looking forward to that. I like it quiet and little activity going on. I just want the time to float on by, with nothing much going on. I liken it to floating on an innertube down a lazy river with the sun warming me.

Haven't heard from my son, and I don't really want to right now. I heard from my ex-husband's wife on Saturday morning, that was annoying, concerning my son. Then my husband told me that my son used his cell phone for over an hour while he was here, and that there were put out your cigs mark on the siding of the door upstairs. My son did tell my husband he used the cell phone, though he shouldn't have used the cell phone. Now I raised my son, I raised him to respect other people's property. I really don't know about my son's ethics anymore. To say the least, I am disappointed in my son, and right now I don't really want to talk to him. Everytime I talk with my parents, especially my mom, she asks if I have heard anything from my son. She also is always asking questions about him. I can just feel my blood pressure and stress level going up. That is why at times I don't want to even talk with my mom or dad. Lately my dad hasn't been too bad to talk with. There isn't anything I can do about my son anymore, he has pretty much made choices that he has to live with now and the consequences that will come down the road. The only thing I can do is be here if and when he needs emotional support and that I love him unconditional.

Well enough writing about that. I am knitting on my mother's winter hat again. My goal is to maybe finish knitting it this week, we will see. I got about two inches knit yesterday while I was watching TV in the afternoon, being quiet so that my husband could sleep before he had to get up and ready for work. That is my life, being kind to others, not being a distraction or a nuisance, hoping that my health stays all right, so that it doesn't interfer with his sleeping. I just am tired and don't want to be a bother to anyone. I wonder what it would be like to have a totally good health and body day. I sound like I am having a "pity party." Well maybe I am, and so what. It feels good to just write it all down and move on. I don't usually complain or whine, though last Friday night, my husband ordered something from our nearby rootbeer stand, something I used to order also. He went and got the food, came home, and was eating it. I sat there and watched, you know to keep him company. After awhile I just couldn't sit there, I was feeling so sad, I went and laid down on our bed, I felt the tears rolling down my face, I was feeling sorry for me because I couldn't have what he was eating. I knew if I ate any of it, I would pay for it later, I would be so sick. So I cried for me, and then I stopped. That should do it for awhile. I have only cried a couple of other times since I got so sick and almost died from c-diff.

This entry today has really been a downer, it doesn't happen often.